


The Light that shines in darkness

by The_Grouse



Series: The Paladin's Way [1]
Category: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, God of War (Video Games)
Genre: Aedric Dovahkiin, Bad Decisions, Dark Past, Flashbacks, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Torture, Past Brainwashing, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rage, Skyrim Main Quest
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:01:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28133610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Grouse/pseuds/The_Grouse
Summary: Voyna was never a good person in the past but when he came across a paladin of a unknown land he accepted to train to be a paladin of light or dark and when Voyna had to choose his path, the Divines made the choice for him and made him there warrior for the light that shines everywhere.
Series: The Paladin's Way [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2061039





	1. New beginnings

“We cannot choose what we want to be when it comes to the fate of our life but we can always make the difference with others to help and care for our fellow people, but when it comes to you Voyna you will have to choose the path of light or dark all over again” when the memory had stopped playing in his head Voyna had stirred awake with the sound of horse hooves hitting cobblestones on a path.

“Hrm damned ambush got me” as he thought in his head, it was hard to move his head due to the fact of him getting hit in the back of the head with a steel sword and with a headache he looked up with his eyes and saw two men infront of him and guessed there was one next to him.

“Hey you you’re finally awake, you were trying to cross the border right, walked right into that imperial ambush same as us and that thief over there” he couldn’t get a word out until the person next to him talked.

“Damn you storm cloaks skyrim was fine until you came along, empire was nice and lazy with the head man looking for you, could have stolen that horse and had been half way to hammerfell, you there you and me shouldn’t be here, it’s these storm cloaks that the empire wants” after he said that Voyna would just wish if they both had shut up already.

“Were all brothers and sisters in binds now thief” after that the wagon driver said something finally “shut up back there” after that Voyna ignored the rest of what they said and before he knew it they were next to a chopping block.

When they were getting off the wagon there names were being called and when the thief was called he made a plea but he tried to make a run for it but failed because of the archers that were nearby, when it was his turn to be called he gave them what they wanted.

“My name is Voyna and i guess my end is near i suppose” with that the other man replied “you picked a bad time to come to skyrim, kinsman” after that i was told to go to the others and wait my time to get killed over nothing.

After they had give ulfric his testament i heard something off in the distance and after that the first storm cloak had gone i was next, i had heard the noise again but it sounded closer but i was already on the block and before i knew it it was something i never had thought to see in skyrim, a dragon.

When i heard ralof say to me to get into the tower to get out of the way of the dragons rage, when they got in Ralof and ulfric talked about the dragons returning and after they were done i had followed him up the stairs until the dragon had busted open a part of the tower and let loose fire onto a man and left as soon as he came.

Ralof told me to jump to the still burning house that's roof had been opened up, when I landed I had taken second to get back up and go down the stairs and out the door and saw the imperial that said my name wasn’t on the list.

He was currently trying to get a kid to him so that the dragon doesn’t get him but a man had gotten turned into ashes and after seeing that the soldier had seen me “Still alive prisoner? Keep close to me if you want to stay that way. Gunnar, take care of the boy. I have to find general Tullius and join their defense” after he had said that I followed him until we were at a crossway between him and Ralof.

I had followed Ralof out of the open and into Helgen keep, he had cut me loose and when he did i had moved my hands around from having them binded for awhile and i had tested if i still had some magika and tested to see if i could hold a invisibility spell that had helped me a lot in the past.

I looked at Ralof and he looked at me before had given me a steel battle axe “Hey grab the clothes off of him your going to need it” as he pointed to the dead storm cloak leaned against the table, it took a minute to get the clothing off of the body but it was put on in a matter of time and before i knew it i was already waiting next to a gate to kill again.

I had never like to kill but i had to make due with what i had, when the imperial guards had come through the gate one of them already had their head gone and another with a axe to the stomach and ripped out, Ralof had finished the guard captain “Hey see if one of those guards had the key to the gate over there” said ralof as i had searched the captain.

It was a quick search as the key was on the woman's waist, after I had got the key I had opened the gate and continued down the stairs to the bottom but before me and Ralof had the time to move past the open area the middle of the ceiling had fallen.

We decided to take the side paths out, I had heard some voices. I had signaled Ralof to back up as I had used my invisibility spell to sneak up on the guards and as quick as I had casted the spell I had them on the ground bleeding like a pig.

Ralof had moved past "Hey Voyna check that barrel for some potions" and as he said that i had opened the barrel to see some potions at the bottom and i had put them in the pouch of the outfit i had on, and as uncomfortable it is i had a stash of armor in the rift that i had in the guild.

I never really was one for light armor, I always liked how the heavy armor made me feel safe due to the fact that I had hand made the armor with various metals that had combined and made the armor shine in the darkness that was caves or the dead of night.

We had come across some of the guards again but they were fighting some other storm cloaks that had made there way down as well in the keep but it seemed like they had it under control i had taken the mage out so they would have a more fighting chance against the imperials.

"Was Jarl Ulfric with you?" Said Ralof as he had started to walk and talk with them while looking at the cage " No I haven't seen him since the dragon showed up" Ralof had looked concerned but had put the thought away as he looked in the cage in the middle 

"Wait a second. It looks like there is something in this cage. (He paused) Ah, but its locked, see if you can open it with some picks, We'll need it when we get out." And before he could walk away the cage was already open within a second and Ralof had just stood there dumbfounded looking at me.

"What?" I asked him he just looked at me and just looked the other way and continued walking "come on we should come across some more imperial soldiers just on the way out." I just shrugged and continued with him until we had to fight again which was short because we came across a open area of the keep.

I had used my spell again to take care of a few of them but i had to go loud because the others were fighting as well so i had snuck up on a few of the archers that were in the far back and killed them to help out.

Although the fighting was done me and Ralof had continued and when we had crossed a wood bridge but before we could think of looking for other options for escape from here but some boulders had fallen on the bridge and broke it.

As we kept walking i had ignored most of the talk from Ralof but i had always thought of a crypt that had to do with a blood ritual near dawnstar but that would have to wait i had remember a lot from my past and before my training as a paladin, but i had always had the strong feeling of wanting to kill so i had joined the dark brotherhood to make the feeling go away but i had made it more hungry basically.

I had to basically do the training with that foreign man about the paladins way and when i had taken the training i had lost the feeling of wanting to kill all the time and felt like i had to choose my fate after it was completed, i had always been lonely in my life with my mother being the only thing before she died when i was just the age of 8 and my father was never even in my life although i think he had given me the blood of a werewolf and so when i had made my way through the thief's guild and made the guild master after the whole thing with the last one.

I was snapped out of my thoughts as Ralof had told me we were near the exit of the cave and so i had followed him to it with the warm welcome of a few frost spiders and snuck past a bear we had made it out and before i could walk away Ralof had pulled me down "HEY what the h-" before i could finish he pointed up and i saw the dragon that had did all the damage to the town.

Me and Ralof had a small chat before he had told me to go to RiverWood and see his sister there, although the walk there was like an hour all i had were myself again although i am used to the silence it still didn't fill the space that was Oh so forgotten that was called the love of another although i am very self dependent i still just think of things like love a luxury that someone has the time to give but i didn't, i was so focused on trying to make myself more efficient with killing and making myself more of a weapon then man.

Although i didn't mind being alone it just didn't feel right to myself after my training a year ago, although i had left my gear with the guild for when i need it the most, i had always never been good with women i had always sat alone or drank outside of the taverns in skyrim, when i had stopped thinking about my past i had looked up and saw the entrance to RiverWood and i saw the woman that Ralof was talking about near the mill.

I had talked to her about helgen and the dragon and she asked me about going to WhiteRun to get some soldiers to come and help defend RiverWood against a dragon attack but like anyone would be able to kill one lest actually take one down and kill it.

I had agreed on going to WhiteRun to get some of the jarls men to defend it and probably see if i could take a wagon or horse to the rift to get my armor so i could have a chance to fight but before i left i had "bought" some steel armor to wear on the trip to the city but i had to get some rest so i went to the inn and took a room to sleep in for the day.

Voyna had made his way to the city and saw it from a far and saw that it was nice for one but what he didn't know was that there was much more in store for him later on in his journey to the path of light.


	2. The Call of Dovahkiin

When Voyna had entered the inn he had walked up to the bar and asked for a room and then asked for a ale, Voyna was never really a heavy drinker or light weight but he always had a spot for drinks as they had sometimes cleared his head but he never dived too far into drinking but had one or two every so often.

And when He got his drink He simply just got up and walked to the corner of the room and sat down and began to think again for a while but when he looked outside when he was finished it was already night, He got up and walked to the room and took off the gear and went to bed for the night.

I don't know what had happened in my sleep but i somehow had my sword in my hand when i woke, i had gotten my gear on and left the inn and made my way to WhiteRun, although it was a boring walk i had at least took my surroundings for granted and liked the way skyrim looked, although it was full of dragons bandits and other things like a civil war as well but i never really had a thing for politics or wars, i always liked to wander around the land and see what was there for the picking and see about new things to do even if it was trying to end it all when mother passed.

When I had snapped out of my head i saw a group of companions fighting a giant and so i took the time to help out, even if they know who i am i still would like to help out and i know my trainer would like that they were my brothers and sisters, the fight had ended with the giant all cut up and bleeding they had taken notice of me right away.

"Voyna i thought i would never see you again brother" Aela had said to me as i looked her way "Yeah i thought i would lend a hand as i was passing by to go to the city" I replied "You know your always welcome to stay with us Voyna" she sounded concerned a little but i had just started walking back to what i was doing "I know that Aela, i just like to adventure and help out." She looked at me but had gotten back to what she was doing beforehand.

I was almost at the gate before a guard had stopped me "WhiteRun is off limits until the dragon threat is dealt with" I shook my head and looked at him "I'm here because RiverWood needs soldiers to help protect them" i said and the guard had looked surprised and grabbed the key at his waist band "Of course, go see the Jarl for reinforcements for RiverWood" after that it was clear steering.

I had made my way up to the Jarls hall and opened the door up to head up the stairs but before i could get close his guard had halted me "What business do you require here" she said as i looked at her "I'm here to ask for some soldiers for RiverWood" her face had looked a bit less tense than before "Well i won't stop you from asking" she said as i started to walk up the stairs to the Jarl.

After I had asked the Jarl about some troops going to RiverWood and he had asked me to help his court wizard with something and then I could get my armor maybe.

I had made my way to the inn it wasn't that full and it was dusk by now so i could have a mug of wine before i rest for the night and go to bleak falls Barrow even though i don't get much rest because of my blood i still like to lie down and rest and just relax, i was already at the inn's bar and had asked for some wine and when the inn keeper had come back i had moved to a corner and sat down to just think and send a letter to vex so that they can get my armor ready for my adventures.

When i had finished my wine i had went to the inn keeper for a room and asked to give a letter to the courier to riften to give to vex for the guild, i had taken my leave to the room and took off the armor and left the sword at the bottom of the floor near the bed and when i had started to drift away to sleep.

I had gotten my gear on and had made my way to Bleak falls Barrow to get the dragon stone for the wizard and see if i could help out more with these dragons to do something with my life then keep going on the path i was on, i had made it near Riverwood and was about to take a path up the mountain when i saw a group of bards walking to somewhere "huh talk about a band on the run" i said in my head but i was too busy to care less and the only time i ever played a lute was when i was alone in one of the rooms in the guild.

I was nearing a tower from the looks of it and when i got there some bandits were there like they were expecting someone to come up here and after a bit they were dead and i had made my way up to the main part and used the blizzard that was going on to sneak in and grab the stone and leave but of course they had to hole up in the place and so after bandit and bandit i had made my way to a puzzle but it was very simple to do and so i had made the stones the correct way and made it past but eventually i had come across a giant frostbite spider that had a bandit hanging in a doorway and so i killed the two and the guy had a golden claw.

I made it farther in the cave and came across a door with a claw shape and so i guessed the claw i picked up corresponded with the door so i match the symbols with the one's on the claw and surprisingly i wasn't shot at by something or hit but i had found the area that looked like the spot for a claw and a wall with some symbols on it and when i approached the wall the words became louder and when i had took a deep breath i somehow learned the word but when i did that a draugr with heavy armor came out of the coffin and surprise surprise it was dead in a couple of minutes but it had some coin on it and also the stone on it.

When i had made it out of the cave and back to WhiteRun i saw that one of the towers looked like it was on fire but maybe it was my eyes playing tricks on me but i made my way to the wizards room and say someone else there but didn't mind and gave the stone or threw the stone on the table to be exact and was about to take my leave until the guard captain came and asked for the wizard and me to come with her to talk with balgruuf about what had happened to the tower i saw on the way back.

15 Minutes Later

The conversation was a simple thank you and kill a dragon that was at the tower that had killed a few guards there and i was no dragon killer or slayer but i had to avenge those poor men for at least putting up a fight, i was walking to the tower when i saw a group of men and the guard captain talking about getting out there and killing a dragon but i knew these men were not going to stand a chance against it but it was worth a try for them.

I was already at the edge of the tower near a rock waiting for them to get there and i got up when they got there and i had told them about the situation and soon after that we moved in to the tower to assess the damage and see if there were some survivors left and one was left "Get out of here the thing is still here it took one of them when he tried to make a run for it, by the makers it back!" He said and just on queue the dragon was here.

I was the first to pull out a bow and start shooting to hit it and get it on the ground to get a better idea on how to kill it, some of the guards had got some shots on it but one of them got scooped up and dropped and one by one they all had fell but some were injured and some were dead i was the last one and the dragon had lander finally and so i pulled out my sword and charged at the damn thing but i was tail swiped and thrown against the wall of the tower and felt my head ring but i was racing to get back up and fight but was pinned by the dragon's claw against the wall and it looked down at me and ripped my helmet off and stared at me with disappointment and said "You are no Dovahkiin, you are just like the rest" it said before it was about to rip my head of i had made made a roar of rage and the last thing i saw was red and from that moment on i could only see out of my eyes as if i had lost control of my body and the thing is i had on top of the dragon and was in the process of snapping its neck and from what i saw was my forearms looked like they were on fire but weren't at the same time and when i had killed the dragon i passed out but saw some of the uninjured run to get me back up but saw the soul of it be taken by me 

The rest of them men had just watch in absolute awe in that one man had taken a beast of the sky and killed it with his own hands and almost walk away unscathed but the they had to rush quickly to get him to the priest in the city to not die and report to the jarl about how it went down and get the other men out of there and heak them as well but what this ment was that Voyna now had a heavy responsibility to carry with him now.

2 days later

I never expected to be almost killed by the dragon but now i am supposed to be a Dragonborn that is meant to kill dragons and take their soul and use their own powers against them for the sake of not having the world end and now i am supposed to go to the throat of the world to learn words that are to be shouts that i use for fighting dragons and others as well, man my life just gets more shit the more i live.

I was able to move around about a couple days ago but they said it was necessary for me but the jarl has made me thane and i am able to buy a house which i did with the coin i have and i have a housecarl that can help me with my adventures but i always work alone so i will just have them watch my home and maybe talk with them but that's about it and now i must make my way to the greybeards for more training in the way of the voice so i can end the dragon threat in skyrim once and for all and maybe i can find a hold that i can build my own home in and life peacefully with myself and my nightmares.

The town that i had to go to was far from the rift but i could make my way into the rift and get my armor to wear and use against the dragons and anyone that comes to stop me from completing my quest.

I walked out of WhiteRun and down to the wagon to get a ride to Riften so i wouldn't have to walk all the way there and and toward the town that was near the start of the steps to high hrothgar, i had payed the wagon driver already and told him to go to riften and from there it was smooth sailing.

When I had arrived at riften i got off and went to the guilds entrance at the graveyard and when i opened the door my armor was already there waiting like it was a dog at the door sitting for his owner to come home and so i had taken the boots and chest plate off and put those on first and then the gauntlets and when i had taken the helmet i had looked at the reflection and saw the face of a man that has nothing to lose.

It was dark out when i had made my trek to the beginning of the 7000 step to high hrothgar and i was about a quarter of the way there when i had made camp for the night and although i don't rest when roaming the land it also keeps the nightmares at bay and keeps my mind clear but i just keep a fire going until the sun comes up and when its time to leave i just focus on the road.

Nights in skyrim are nice to look at when not killing someone or something or surviving but you get time to look at you current position and take in the surroundings and enjoy the nature but when you've lost your family and most of your life you lose half of your soul and can never get it back unless someone comes into said life but those type of things are very rare for people.

It was almost day out when I looked up and saw that the fire was almost dead so I grabbed my pack, stomped out the fire and made my way down the road until the day was gone and do that most of the time and sometimes write things in a journal as a log of the past days.

I was at my destination near the 7000 steps and it was night out but i assumed that it would take a while to get up the steps so i started to climb up the steps to high hrothgar to get to the greybeards to learn about what my path is and what it means to be Dragonborn.

I was almost half way maybe when i decided to take a rest for a moment and looked at my surroundings and everything look so small from where I was but I had no time for that as i had to keep making my way up and get to my goal.

The steps were not that bad other than the occasional snow troll and wolf but other then that it was easy but avoid the cliffs and snow holes and you'll be fine and when i was done thinking again i saw that high hrothgar was in sight and so i camped for the night and waited for day to come so i can meet the grey beards for the first time and learn my path.


	3. Old wounds

As i saw the sun rise i had waited some hours so that i hoped that everyone that might be awake in high hrothgar and as i had made my way into the building i saw a greybeard and as I walked up he had lifted his head to speak to me but i spoke first “I come here to answer the call of the greybeards” i said and i think i had made him a bit mad by interrupting him but he them looked at me “Ah so it would seem that you did answer our call but let us see if you truly have the thu’um” as he said that i had taken my helmet off so i could let it pass through the metal without damaging it “Fus” the greybeard had taken a step back as he had “tasted” my thu’um and had them got his barings again.

“So it is true you are Dragonborn, welcome to high hrothgar, but may i ask a question Dragonborn” i nodded in reply “what Brings you here Dragonborn?” i had looked at him with a hint of confusion “to learn more about what it means to be Dragonborn and to learn the Thu’um” with that he looked with a smile “them you have come to the right place Dragonborn"

40 minutes Later

The greybeards have told me that they need the horn of jurgen windcaller and surprise surprise its in a crypt like all buried things and my guess was i need some help with this and so the only person i thought of was lydia, i was making my way to whiterun again but hey at least i have a home there and fully outfitted as well for personal needs but the one thing i question is why i had gotten a kids room but i must have been thinking about something during my house decorating.

I had to go to Whiterun to get some supplies for the trip and ask lydia for some help and at least let her adventure with me at least once or twice so they can at least see what its like to travel with me but the supply's are number one as of right now.

4 minutes later

I had spent a hefty amount of gold for the trip there and back and on my way there i had gotten lydia to come with and i was about to check in with the resident priest if i had any ailments at all and when i was coming out i saw a girl that was begging for money for food.

"Hey mister can you spare a coin" she asked and i had taken my helmet off so i could talk without having to be Muffled by the helmet "why yes i can, but why are you begging little one?" I asked and when i had asked i had always felt the need to help but with my past it makes it hard to have such things "It's what uncle would say back on there farm" she had said and it had hit me like a dragon that she was left to the wolfs to survive by begging for money just to get by with enough food "Well you could always come be with me so you don't have to beg" i had said it with the most sincere voice that i would never hear come out of my mouth "Really you would do that!" I heard her say and it put a smile on my face "Yeah i really do mean it little one, and also whats your name?" I had asked "Lucia, Thank you mister or i mean Papa" i had told her where breezehome was and when i was exiting the gates of Whiterun i had told lucia that i would be back and to help her self to any food that was in the house and gave her a sack of coins to spend while away and to make use of it.

10 Hours later

There was a blizzard that had come out of nowhere in the mountain pass and thank the divines for the fur that was with my armor and my fur cloak, i had given lydia a spare cloak to wear so we both don't die of frostbite but i could see the town of morthal in the distance "Lydia were almost to the town!" I had yelled due to the winds that were unbearable and i could hear almost nothing "My thane tell me why we are all the way out here" she asked as i peered through my helmets eye slots "I need to find the horn of jurgen wind caller for the greybeards so i can learn the final word of a shout or thu'um" i had replied and she had understood.

We had made it to morthal with our fingers and toes still on us and i had rented a room from the inn and i had lydia sleep for a few hours then i woke her when the time had come to leave for the crypt and get the horn and return to the greybeards.

Ustengrav Entrance

When we had got to the entrance i had set camp up for us to get rest so we don't run on coals while down there and i had took stock of our supplies and made the fire 'You can't keep yourself contained for long Voyna you will come back to me' i snapped my head up and looked around and saw his figure behind a tree. "Harkon... Hrm get out of my head vermin" i said while looking him dead in the eye's 'hehe you can't keep me out for long paladin, you will soon see that you will come back to following my orders.' i had stood up from my spot "I OBEY YOU NO MORE VERMIN" i had told him but them woke up from my bedroll with a cold sweat and breathing hard i had put my helmet back on went into the crypt with lydia.

Ustengrav crypt

We had made out way through a army of dragr and a short detour for a word of power that i heard which was Feim or become ethereal shout and we had made it though with minimal damage to us but my sword could use a bit of sharpening when i get the time to do so but we were nearing the end of the crypt and we decided to take check of our stuff "hey lydia your armor damaged?" I asked and from the looks of it it wasn't "No my thane but thank you for asking" she said and i was a bit concerned but that would have to come later as i had opened the door and saw 4 constructs go up and when i got to the altar at the end i was all but happy as a note was left in place of the horn.

After reading the note it said to ask for the attic room in the Riverwood inn, but before i consider talking to this person i had to get some more supplies for another trip and rest.

Whiterun 2 days later

As me and lydia had entered Whiterun i had when to Warmaiden to get me armor checked on and sharpen my sword which to about 15 minutes the armor was barely touched my the looked buy had a few scratches on the plates other then that it was fine and Adrianne had told me that either my Smithing was above master level or made my someone with that level, and as mich as i wanted to tell her i had made it i had kept my mouth shut.

I had entered my home in Whiterun and saw lucia run up to me and hug me "Papa your back did you get me something?" She asked and i remember grabbing a small gold pouch from the crypt "Yeah i did can you guess what?" She was deep in thought but had a quick response "Is it a sword?" She asked but i had shook my head and with a surprise yelp from he i had her in a bear hug and put her down "no but i did find a small gold pouch that you can use in the market or the blacksmith" when i had the small pouch in my hand i had a firm grip on it when she was gonna snach it out of my hand "lucia.. i know you were begging for gold before i had taken you in, but you must know that you need to think about what you buy and how much it costs" she had taken a moment or two to think about it and she had nodded and i had let the grip on the bag go and she had attached it onto her dress belt "when you have the time lucia go to the jorrvaskr and talk to Aela for some training in self defense and when you get older you can work on more harder things and i will not be here all the time so that will pass the time while I'm away but when I'm here i can teach you how to defend yourself" i had said that she had looked happy and before i could get up she had pulped me into a hug "thank you papa" she then had gone to her room and when i turned around to lydia she had a big smile on her face.

"Who thought your were so good with kids Voyna" i had simple shook my head but them remembered my life beforehand and remembered Arthur and Abigail and gave myself a shudder in remembering what happened to them "i guess you can say i used to be a father before" i had given her a answer but gave off the tone that i didn't want to remember that time in my life.

"My thane if you need to talk about anything, just ask and i can listen" i had given lydia a warm smile and shook my head "its alright lydia its just something i don't feel comfortable talking about anymore".

????

I opened my eyes to see that its dark all around that i look, i tried to get up but something kept me from doing so and to my guess it was what i had knew where i was, i was in Harkons torture room chained to the wall. 

"Voyna...there is no escape from me now" he had said i started to sweat buckets by now "You leave them alone Harkon, there not part of this" i saw my own kin in a cage chained as well and gagged "Voyna i could care less if there not part of this, you forget who you are dealing with" i was trying to free myself but to now avail it was pointless "GOD DAMN IT HARKON, LEAVE THEM ALONE" i had yelled but it was too late as they were already bleeding from there throats and he turned to me and started to pull out a sword "Come on do it already you piece of SHIT, COME ON DO IT" i had yelled with tears in my eyes and rage building up.

"not this time Voyna i want to savor this" i had already started to breath more heavily and by the time Harkon had got to me the chains had been snapping from me as i yelled in rage and before i knew it i was already trying to kill Harkon but to no avail he was too quick.

Instead of trying to fight i had busted a wall out and jumped out of it the cold wind and water was something else and everything after that was a blur and when i woke i was drenched in sweat and breathing too quickly and on the verge of passing out but i had stabilized enough to catch my breath and get ready for going to Riverwood alone.

Riverwood-night

As i had made my way to the inn at Riverwood i was very shook on my nightmares that i have been having as of late and does it have something to do with what happened long ago or is it because of something that is going to happen later in my life but that would have to wait as i had to talk to who ever it was that wanted me to rent a "attic" room for some reason.

"Welcome you can rent a room, have a meal or both if you want" as i looked over i saw a blond nord woman say and i didn't really want to was time as it was a precious thing now that alduin was around "could i rent the attic room" i had asked and before i could say something she had told me to go to a room to my right and when i had sat down in one of the chairs in the room the door opened up showing the same woman.

"So your the dragonborn i have been hearing so much about, i think your looking for this" she held the horn out and to which i grabbed "we need to talk follow me".

As much as i wanted answers i followed but kept on of my hidden daggers ready for anything, we made it to a room across the inn which looked nicely furnished i might admit "close the door and we can talk" i gave her a look but did so and when the door shut i had heard the distinct sound of a false back panel open.

1 hour later

After a long conversation of her saying a lot of things to me and suspecting that i was a thalmor agent she had told me at the end that a dragon was going to be resurrected near the town of kynesgrove and before i take on another dragon i made a plan to go to high hrothgar first and then kynesgrove, but before i do all that i need to find a place to meditate or release my anger.

As i was walking down the path to Whiterun i had seen a nice clearing a bit away from the path and decided to set my camp there for a bit and probably meditate for guidance and to not let my anger loose on someone or something.

My camp was standard, a small fire and my pack next to me and i had taken my armor off and set it next to me and was left in the under armor that was made of a thick leather and hardened steel

I had started to meditate and all i saw was darkness and then light, the next thing i see is Abigail and Arthur playing in the grass together and when she looked at me everything changed from a sunny day in a field to a dark and bloody room with them looking at me scared and afraid of whats about to happen next, and before i had continued i snapped out of it and looked around and saw that it was dusk i had grabbed my pack and went on the path again to Whiterun and to go to ivarstead and then to Windhelm to go to kynesgrove 

The carriage ride to ivarstead was quiet and nothing had happened so far except for a deafening silence and the sounds of the carriage but the images i saw were something that has something to do with this place and to see them again was painful and depressing to my mind but i remember a pair of travelers that had been around skyrim for a while one of them had red markings and the other was scarred on the face but deadly with a bow but something about them tells me that they aren't from around here.

But the one thing i do know is that i could sense he was a god of something from another realm and i was born a god from one of the Divines but not who i still have the markings on my back but they are something else and the man i saw with the red markings had made my marking on my back burn for some reason and i knew he was a god from that moment and he felt it too when he had looked my way from that time in 2nd Era.

But something tells me that they may or may not be alive anymore or they could be very alive and still walking around skyrim doing things together but the one thing that had peaked my interest was the blades that he had on his back, i remember hearing tales from my mother before she passed of a man with red markings that had destroyed two lands and traveled to a new realm to escape from them.

And now i remember who he was, it was Kratos. The God Of War from Greece that had killed the Greek Gods and the Norse gods too and his weapon of choice for those kills was. The Blades Of Chaos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the delay for this chapter i have been too distracted playing skyrim and a bunch of other games but i will keep working on this work.


	4. memory's and thalmor

It had taken me aback that i had remembered seeing a god of war from a alternative reality of nirn how he got here was unexplainable and how he was still kicking was out of my grasp all i know is that my God hood was never really known to me i didn't know what i even was, let alone come across another god that could have very well known what i was and killed me but i remember all those eras ago when i was cursed with immortality and doomed to walk the nirn until the end of time and see it end but with Alduin here on nirn again meant the end of time was near but me being the last Dragonborn had meant i was given this gift from Akatosh when i was born and He had saw my future and what lurked but most of my memories have faded away with time and i could only remember certain bits and pieces but that never meant the day he took them from me was lost my end goal was to kill Lord Harkon and have my family avenged.

I was snapped out of thought when the carriage driver had tapped my shoulder, i had given him the gold for the trip and got off and made the long walk up to the greybeards to give them the horn that they requested.

"Master Arngeir i have the horn of jurgen windcaller" 

15 minutes later

"Master Arngeir, I have a question: do you know what i am." I had asked him to see if he knew what i was on the inside "that i do Dragonborn, i do know that you have a power other than the gift of being Dragonborn and see that it is a bright light that shines through all the pain and suffering you have endured."

"That was all i had to ask Master, i will be on my way" after i had given the horn to Master Arngeir they had taught me the last word to unrelenting force and i had asked them what it meant to be Dragonborn but before i left Master Arngeir said goodbye "Remember sky above, voice within"

The trek down the path was tiring but ivarstead had a inn for which I thanked the Divines, when I got to the inn i asked for a room and a meal as I had sat down. I took off my helmet and placed it on my pack.

'Why must Harkon haunt me now, is it because I'm back in skyrim again, or is something going to happen later on in skyrim.' My pondering was interrupted when i had accidentally spilled a bit of mead on my pants

"Damn it" I whispered so no one else could hear or look my direction but to no avail my pants were soaked near my crotch and to the eye it wasn't very pleasant, the room I had rented was small but lasted its usage for a night.

As my armor was taken off i had finally felt the weariness of not sleeping for a whole couple of days and for the norm i read a book for a minute or two but time was of essences and that the world was face with destruction from Akatosh's first born alduin and for my longing for a peaceful life alone was hindered from the wars of past eras and the most recent one involving oblivion and daedra was almost too much and now i have yet to deal with dragons of all things to happen now it had to be dragons.

As i shut my eyes and drift to the chains of sleep i see my wife and child from all that time ago but as i try to reach out i wake in the same dark and dank room that is Harkons torture room and as i look around i see my broken and startved body as i look around i see my son and wife in a cage in nothing but rags and in chains as i relive the time in the first era when i had been foolish to follow Harkon for power but un the end of my service i was to be killed and left with no trace along with my family, but as soon as i had approached my past self i woke to my room in the inn i was in at ivarstead.

The walk to kynesgrove was not very exciting as i would say but the occasional bandit would try me for my coin but i had always tried to talk to then to change them to leave the life they had but they would never listen and attack me regardless of my armor and weapons, as i was walking to kynesgrove i saw one of the residents run from the town.

"Don't go up there there is a dragon attacking" the woman said to me but i had ignored her plea and ran up the hill to see delphine already behind a tree hiding to not be seen

In the distance was the only recognizable voice in the distance that only one dragon had that was guttural and deep like darkness.

Alduin

Alduin was up above the hill resurrecting another dragon for his fleet that was ever growing in size by the days and although i couldn't understand the words he was saying i felt casting of conjuration magic from a shout he made and like any conjuration the dead dragon that was in the ground came back.

"Such arrogance you don't even know the language of the dovah and yet you call yourself one"

Alduin had gone back to speaking with the now fully resurrected dragon and said something to him and had ended up with the dragon looking at me and I knew that Alduin had ordered the dragon to do something with me.

"This doesn't have to end with one of us dead dragon" the dragon had looked like it got even more spiteful of me 'well shit i just had to run my mouth' saying in my head i had grabbed my bow from my shoulders and started to hit the dragons wings to get it on the ground so i can use my Zweihänder and do more damage that way instead of using arrows.

The battle was more drawn out then the last one due to me not losing myself in my blind rage but since i had killed the one dragon at the watch tower i had gotten more into touch with my aedra power and was more focused and steady with a blade and i felt the power of other beings but why has it awoken again now the immortality stayed but the powers faded after i had gotten them all that time ago when Akatosh had gifted it to me as a paladin of light and as something to remind me of all the good i did during the late second era and third but when the third ended i was left with no power and was mortal in power but now in the forth with the dragons returning from the dead because of Alduin it makes sense now.

I was made a god to be the one that keeps the end at bay for as long as the Divines wish it and will it, and it was Akatosh himself that had greeted me when i was done with my time as a paladin and had been on the brink of suicide but when he had shown himself i was lifted from the dark and brought into the light as a new divine and protector of the man and mer, but not so right now the dragon was falling as i had made a large chunk of wing out with arrows.

"Dur Alduin never told me i would go up against Fathers Qahnaarin"

"Then Alduin is a coward to run from me and not face me" the rage was slowly building up again and instead of be blinded by it i was in control and so when the dragon had gotten back up i had a golden flame build up from my hands and stopping at my elbows i had enchanted my blade with my Flame, the dragon had breathed his flame but when i had walked out of the fire i saw the dragons raw fear deep in its eyes.

It was feared death by its own father's warrior that was resistant to the elements and many weapons that Talos himself never held in combat, as I was approaching the dragon with my blade in one hand I raised my sword and bowed as a signal of respect and honor.

The dragon had made a strike but missed as I sidestepped the attack and slashed the side of the dragon making deep gashes, the dragon had countered with a tail whip that i wasn't expecting but blocked with my shield but had underestimated the force of the blow and went flying into a tree.

'Damn it why did i think that was a good idea' getting back up i saw that my shield had a new dent in it buy like the others this one was more noticeable than them, getting back up was challenging as the dragon had been ready with an attack that was coming fast and countered with a roll to the side of the dragons to get a good strike.

"*sigh* can't we just settle this without you attacking me relentlessly can we" with a quick respell of fire on my sword and brought my shield up to block the stream of fire, 'why do i do these moronicly stupid things' when the dragon was done with the flames i had rushed for its head and slashed its eye out to get the opening for a finisher and climbed up the dragons head "May the light take you to the Divines" and with one final raise of my sword i plunged my sword into the dragons head.

While the dragon's soul was being absorbed i had kneeled down "May Akatosh take your mind and be with you" with the dragon dead delphine pops back out from watching the fight with me and the dragon.

"So you really are The Dragonborn, I suppose you have questions for me, and i have answers" the blood on my blade was still dripping but with a slight shift my cloak was already cleaning the blade in my hand.

"Yes I suppose I do but I know a lot about the blade's and that you have been looking for me and me peculiarly, but you must know who I am and what I am."

"That i do Voyna the paladin of light, or should i say the Divine that refused to be with the others and is the greatest warrior of all time and the man that lives in seclusion until now, everyone has heard the story of the man that walks in light and the guardian of tamriel."

"That i am delphine, but from what I see and saw with my own eyes was the bringing of Alduin, but i do have questions for you but not here, let us go to Windhelm's inn."

~4E 201 30th of the First Seed~

Delphine was very uptight about things at first but when she had seen for her own eyes that i was Dragonborn and aedric but the one thing she didn't tell me was needing to sneak into a thalmor embassy and stealing info about some old guy that might be dead for all i know but here i am giving guy named malborn and most of my armor being stored with delphine.

But such as life when you get to have some fine brandy that the thalmor give out, but the time for drinks has passed the lord's work must be done.

Malborn was very cautious at first but when i had a drunk make a distraction in the lobby for a quick slip out and Malborn had led me to the kitchen.

"Malborn, who is this that you brought into here" the khajiit had said as they were putting something down and my guess was that it was moon sugar.

"Just a sick guess is all" as he pointed for me to go into a side room that led into a hallway hopefully.

"You know the rules, guests aren't allowed back here-

"I also didn't know that moon sugar was allowed carlotta"

"Just get out of here, i saw nothing"

'Well that was something else but as long as I can just get the information that Delphine needs' I had some ebony armor that I made the day prior to today and enchanted with stealth enchantments.

"Alright got your gear now i have to lock the door behind you when you leave." I put on my last shoulder pad and went out into the hall's.

The halls had thalmor roaming all around and my spells were powerful but illusion was a weak spot for me but the spells were still good but didn't last long as i expected but i had to work on that skill tree.

Making my way to the courtyard i had noticed that it was nearing night and that would provide ample opportunities for sneaking around the embassy 'now if i was a area with a desk that has info where would i be' looking at the guard leaned on the door i had grabbed a rock and threw it to the other side to distract him.

As easy as it was distracting a guard i had to make my way to the desk or chest that had the information and its not like brynjolf probably knows who I'm looking for but i tend to not use the thefts guild much because of the usage of daedra and how it goes against my oath but me taking from the corrupt and giving to better causes like the orphanage and other places that requires gold to sustain itself i still honor my oath but my past may say otherwise.

Focusing back on the task at hand i was past the roaming guards and in a office that looked nice but not as nice as my home in the pale but my home is nowhere near towns or near a city but home is home and the documents talk about a man in the basement torture room but at least its not as "decorative" as the dreaded place i had escaped from but a torture room will always remind me of him and her.

From entering the basement i heard a man in pain saying he doesn't know anything and hearing this was making my head spin but i must focus on the task at hand and be in my mind back at home if possible.

"i told you i don't know anything about a old man"

"Lies will only make the pain worse"

"please no more…"

"He said no more"

As i said that the robed thalmor had been surprised as he had tried to send a spell off i had kicked him onto the ground the torturer had made his way out of the cell and was mid swing before i had knocked the blade out of his hand and knocked him out with a swift headbutt and stomped the other thalmor to knocked him out.

"wh-who are you" he asked as i was working on the locks on his arms "just someone looking for a old man to deal with dragons that's all" the locks had come off leaving the man to pick himself up and when he got up i gave him a health potion "thank you, i've seen them dump bodys off here when there done with them".

Searching the chest near the knocked out thalmor i had found notes on delphine, Ulfric, and someone named esbern but i got the info i need but before i could open the trap door some thalmor had stormed in.

"Come out spie we found your accomplice, if you don't show yourself he will die" a simple lie just to kill us both i had casted detect life and saw four of them 'hm four and i have four knives for these types of things.

Turning the corner I had pulled the knives out and sent them into the heads of all four of them and left Malborn to rush down the stairs to me and the stranger.

Exiting via the hatch I had seen one frost troll that was easy to deal with and running out into the open. I had told Malborn to run and the other guy as well leaving me to make my way back to my home in the pale that wasn't far.

4E 201 1st of Rains Hand

Opening the door, dust had filled my nose from leaving my home for so long and the last time i was here was when the oblivion crisis was beginning and casting a light whirlwind spell to dissipate the dust, casting a controlled fire spell i had lit the fires and candles around the house to light the place up and putting the key into my library i had felt relief that my books were at least not deteriorating from not being used, going into the cellar and getting a bottle of wine i had made my way into my library to write down notes and ease my mind from the embassy.

Remembering what had happened in when entering the torture room i had put the book down and my chalice of wine and went outside for meditation to clear my mind.

Closing my eyes and focusing on my mind I was somewhat at peace but the memory of Valerica I had started to remember what was her first visit to my cell in the cistern somewhere.

*Flashback start*

"Yesterday...all my troubles were so… far away…" weakly i had moved my head up "Ah..if it isn't momma vampire...here to torture me too or kill me finally."

she had lifted my head back up "no not yet..but i do need someone to test out some poisons...and you seem the most willing seeing that your in no position to protest but i'll "try" not to kill you yet as harkon will need something to do in the past time"

With the last bit of strength i tried to break the chains keeping me "just kill me already its already enough torture having to hear harkon blab about how he feels about you and your daughter, just kill me or release me but do not waste my time with talk".

With me saying the bit before my plea she had peaked interest "What has he said about us, and if you are telling the truth i'll think about giving you a vile of a health potion but tell me what he has said."

Rolling my eyes at the way to get me to talk i knew the real reason why he kept me here "oh well last time he was here he said something along the lines of and i quote "Valerica and serana are becoming a problem but whos to say you will say anything Voyna your already a dead man and when i find a way to read my scroll you will be delt with like Valerica and maybe serana, but when that day happens you'll be dead by then." There you happy Valerica, now scram before he finds you here wouldn't want to hear you both bickering right in front of me" with me putting my head back down i took on last look at her "also you should tone it down on the snowberry perfume and much as it smells nice it's a little too overwhelming, now go, leave me to my suffering and loneliness."

With me saying that she had spun around quickly and I knew I said something to make her get out of the room as fast as that.

*flashback end*

With opening my eyes i saw it was dusk and was starting to snow, dusting my clothes off of dirt and a bit of snow on my shoulders i made my way to my bedroom and pulled my clothes off except for my pants and got comfortable in the furs and started to drift to sleep in a matter of a couple minutes and before i knew it sleep had taken its way.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading, updates will be every weekend if possible


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